"In societies where Robbing Hoods are treated like a celebrity it is but natural to expect political parties to act like a Mafia syndicate" Political Jaywalker "In a nation where corruption is endemic people tend to confuse due process with aiding and abetting criminals" Political Jaywalker "War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left" Bertrand Russell "You have just one flash flood of money, you keep your people poor. It's like a time bomb and it's scary" Philippine Lawmaker

Filipino Americans of Cabalen descent chanting GAGA errrr GMA All The Way Poorever

Ok they did not exactly chant poorever errr forever but Lu Tong Mancau who is hard of hearing thought they were chanting GAGA forever. The US bwisit errr visit of course will not be complete without some frolicking by Gloria Arroyo with her cabalens in an event hosted by FIL-USA. Funny though but this new Filipino American group was just formed a few months ago by former Angeles City Mayor Edgardo D. Pamintuan, Arroyo’s adviser for Subic and Clark infrastructure projects.

So is the organizer US based while he serves as an adviser for the president? If indeed Edgardo Pamintuan is based in the Philippines this guy really move mountains or was it the dollar to get 500 people to the event. Lu Tong Mancao says he just don’t know if more than half of those who attended are mostly from the Philippines since La Gloria travels with a large retinue of bootlickers. But then again knowing that a good number of Filipino Americans are typical of Photo Op hungry like Philippine traditional politicians who scrambles to position themselves beating even a Ron Artest to the punch, it really does not come as a surprise that even a dubious president is treated like a celebrity they shamelessly errr proudly wants to share in the steal errr still image for “posterity.”

This is almost like a circus freak show that went to Washington and I can’t help but quote Valli Faith Estacion Bibit at Facebook paraphrasing Disraeli that seems to be the sentiment of a lot of Filipinos even the Americanized ones:
If PGMA were to fall into the Potomac during her visit to Washington, that would be a misfortune. If they dragged her out again, that would be a calamity.
Would you believe that Stuntman/Actor turned senator Lito Lapid was also with the circus errr the party who personally appealed to Gloria Arroyo just like a juvenile brat so he can tag along. To his credit or was it discredit, I should say he is the embodiment of shallowness like a star struck fan but to his credit he was honest enough (a rare instance I should say) to blabber his position or lack of it, to quote:
“I hope I’d be lucky enough to be chosen among the five that would be allowed to accompany the President when she meets Obama. This will be my first time ever to meet a US president in person because I might not have the chance anymore. So I asked the President herself to sign me up on this trip,” said Lapid in Filipino during an interview with reporters before the FilUSA dinner for the President at the Willard Hotel.

Based on previous announcements made by Malacañang, the five slots in the Obama visit would be allotted to Executive Secretary Eduardo Ermita, Foreign Affairs Secretary Alberto Romulo, Philippine Ambassador to the US Willy Gaa, a representative each from the House (Speaker Prospero Nograles), and the Senate (Senator Miriam Defensor Santiago is the head of the Senate Foreign Affairs committee and she is part of the entourage).

Lapid said he was not planning on saying anything to Obama if he met him face-to-face.

“I will just listen because it is up to the President (Arroyo) what they should talk about, I will just be there for support,” he said.

Lapid admitted that he was starstruck by Obama that he would do anything just to have photograph with the most powerful man in the world. “I like him because he is young and he is the first black US President,” said Lapid.
Now that is a senator speaking, thank gawd his kind is not the majority or is it? I can’t help laugh so hard at one of the response from Pora C. Poblacion complete with Pampango accent, which I quote:
Lito, cabalen, indi ka na nga dapat magsalita. Mairap na. May mga lubid naman ang mga kurtina dun. Makitahan mo na lang ng stunt si Obama. Pero dapat masuhot ka ng rubbers shoes baka madulas ka sa makinang na baldosa. Mapaiya pa kaming iyong mga cabalen. (Lito my provincemate, you really should not talk. Anyway there are ropes in the curtains there. Just show Obama some stunt act but make sure you wear rubber shoes you might slip and stumble in their shiny floors. You really don’t want to embarrass us your province mates.)
Lapid says he cannot run for re-election as he cannot afford to raise the campaign funds needed so with presidential son Luan Miguel “Mikey” Arroyo’s blessing he is running for Governor. He was the former governor of Pampanga whose measly lahar quarry fee collection for a year took just a couple of weeks when Among Ed Panlilio took the helm of the Capitol. This he say will dispel the rumors that Gloria Arroyo is not running for a seat in congress in the district where Mikey Arroyo is the incumbent with plans to run for a third term.

I just hope that Malacanag did not bring with them the stink that surrounds the palace where diarrhea is prevalent and now getting to be one of the major killers in the country. A country whose president deludes herself that in 2010 the Philippines will be an economic force to reckon with when people along the river have not seen or uses the palace river as their toilet as seen in this video courtesy of Carlo Cielo at Facebook.

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July 29, 2009

Washington District of Columbia
United States of America

Dear Mr. President,

We shared the wonderful jubilation of the American people during your historic election triumph. When you assumed office early this year, we rejoiced at the audacious hope that you inspired, and on your promise of change for the common good.

We joined all freedom loving people of the world who exulted when you declared that “those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent… are on the wrong side of history.”

The Filipino people share the same morals, ideals, and aspirations that define the envied way of life of the American people. Filipinos yearn for the same kind of leaders that the American people yearn for themselves; leaders who are imbued with the right values, lead principled lives, and govern with the highest ethical standards. The ideals of justice, democracy and the upliftment of human rights animate the Filipino people’s dreams of a better world in much the same way that these ideals animate the dreams of the American people.

Upon your invitation, President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo will have the chance to meet with you on July 30, 2009. In your meeting with Ms. Arroyo, it may serve you well to be mindful of Ms. Arroyo’s legacy of corruption, extra-judicial killings, enforced disappearances, torture, bribery, election cheating, among others. We do not wish to belabor you with the details of these high crimes which have surely been documented and reported by the U.S. State Department to your Office.

The Filipino people also yearn for change from the effrontery of hopelessness and the curse of decadence that Ms. Arroyo represents. In your meeting with Ms. Arroyo, we feel confident that you will make clear to her that a Government that does not comply with Principles of Democracy and respect for Human Rights cannot have the approval and support of your administration. We implore you Mr. President to inspire hope and be an instrument of change for the common good of the long suffering Filipino people.


Teofisto T. Guingona Jr.
Former Vice President

Jovito R. Salonga
Former Senate President

Franklin Drilon
Former Senate President

Camilo D. Quiazon
Former Supreme Court Justice

Wigberto E. Tañada
Former Senator

Sergio R. Osmeña III
Former Supreme Court Justice

Vicente T. Paterno
Former Senator

Agapito A. Aquino
Former Senator

Josefina T. Lichauco
Former Cabinet Secretary/CCM

Francisco I. Chavez
Former Solicitor General

Corazon J. Soliman
Former Cabinet Secretary

Juan Santos
Former Cabinet Secretary

Jejomar C. Binay
Mayor, Makati City

Bro. Eddie C. Villanueva
National Chairman, PJM

Sr. Mary John Mananzan, OSB
Co-Chairperson, AMRSP

Harry L. Roque Jr.

Jun I. Lozada
State Witness, ZTE-NBN
Courtesy of Mila Aguilar at FaceBook notes

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Senator Pimentel: Con-Ass efforts will fail

LOS ANGELES -- Philippine Senator Aquilino "Nene" Pimentel Jr. doused cold water on fears that the House of Representatives would be able to bypass the Senate in legislating changes to the constitution.

The Senate minority leader was responding to questions from members of the press and community leaders headed by FACLA President Greg "Meng" Gatus during an open forum at the social hall of the Filipino American Communities of Los Angeles (FACLA) located at Historic Filipinotown. Also in attendance were Deputy Consul General Daniel R. Espiritu and Vice Consul John Reyes of the LA-based Philippine consulate.

It may be recalled that one night last month congressmen outraged Filipinos by hastily passing a legislative measure to convene itself as a constituent assembly without the institutional participation of the Senate.

About the 2010 elections, the veteran lawmaker said that he will not be running but offered words of advice regarding the presidential candidates.

"Don't look for a saint because saints are already in heaven," he said. It's enough that a candidate has more good virtues than sins to merit one's vote.

PHOTO: Senator Nene Pimentel, right, says that voters should not be looking for a saint to vote to office. Other photo shows FACLA President Meng Gatus congratulating the legislator after his speech while Vice President Paul Julian looks on.
Dionesio C. Grava - Part-time community journalist based in Los Angeles and editorial writer at Forum Asia.

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The Cambridge incident involving Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. Arrested by Sgt. James Crowley & Barack Obama's Response

Is an apology forthcoming in the incident involving the arrest of Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. by Sgt. James Crowley? From the looks of it no apology is forthcoming with the Cambridge police union standing by Sgt. Crowley, so will we see a lawsuit regarding the incident?

Indeed, race is still a sensitive issue and as a people of color this is a cause for concern. Not knowing all the facts that transpired or what exactly was the state of mind of the arresting officer it will be difficult or unfair to pass judgment or state categorically that this is indeed racial profiling. There is no doubt though that race is still a very sensitive issue but on the other hand a lively debate will help in the healing process of the past.

What is disturbing is the fact that one can get arrested in one’s own home. In your own home where one should feel safe, your own space from the mad world out there that you consider your own sanctuary. Was the neighbor suspicious of a “break-in” or “home invasion” reporting what he/she saw because he was HWB (housed while black)?

What is outstanding is how Barack Obama shows class in calling Sgt. Crowley stating his regret over his choice of words that may have added to the frenzy in his earlier remark that the police “acted stupidly,” to quote NY Daily News:

"My sense is you've got two good people in a circumstance where neither of them were able to resolve the incident in a way that it should have been," he said, putting some of the blame on his friend, Gates.

"I continue to believe … that there was an overreaction in pulling Prof. Gates out of his home," Obama said, but conceded Prof. Gates probably over reacted as well."

And he suggested that folks need to put themselves in the shoes of black Americans who have a history of unfair treatment by authorities.” African-Americans are sensitive to these issues," Obama said, adding that interactions between blacks and police can be "fraught with misunderstanding."

Obama added that he doesn't regret talking about the local issue, in spite of criticism to that effect, because "the fact that this has become such a big issue" shows "race is still a troubling aspect of our society."
On the one hand while I am concerned over the incident this is minor compared to the experience of Fil-Am activist Melissa Roxas giving me the chill that lunatics are armed with guns and badges can terrorize anyone with impunity. Instead of investigating the incident the military establishment choose to lie and the palace blabbermouth Glori-LIE Fajardo going along with it truly makes you wonder what kind of human beings roam the Philippine corridor of power.

This is what makes America great; in contrast I wonder how Gloria M. Arroyo that Philippine Garcified president would have reacted in the same circumstance? I think I know how she would react; she probably will call not the cop but the professor. Ok that was unfair we don’t know that and that is pure speculation on my part. One thing I know though based on the horrible experience of a whistle blower who instead of ordering her hooligans errr investigative agencies to conduct an investigation based on the testimony of the Acza Ramirez on the corruption at the Bureau of Internal revenue she was paraded as an accused not just one of the culprit but the principal. Now, that tells a lot what kind of presidency the Philippines has and to think that she will be an official visitor of the White House will be a study in contrast. Maybe, US Pres. Obama should just cancel the invitation simply because this intruder errr bwisit ooopps visit may turn the White House into a big freak circus what with 100 Philippine house representatives going along for a free ride. Unless NASA needs volunteers to send 100 people to Mars and leave them there forever then they should encourage these freebie obsessed solons to take the free trip.

Unlike the US president who is has no problem in regretting his earlier comment the Garcified Philippine president who despite being advised she had it all wrong on the Acza Ramirez mistake simply ignored or should we say acted stupidly. Such misplaced priority or whacked moral compass surely makes the corrupt shenanigans in the tong collection errr the Bureau of Internal Revenue jump in joy as if being commended for a job well done so keep it up boys and girls.

With a president like Gloria Arroyo it would come as no surprise that the police who were involve in a “shoot-out” or rather rub-out of suspected carjackers was promoted to the horror and consternation of the victims relatives.
I say convince NASA people to send also send Gloria Arroyo and her con ass cohorts to Mars, if that will not work at least to the moon and leave them there for good.

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It's Confirmed - The kleptocrat is coming to Washington DC!

I got it straight from the Philippine Embassy - La Gloria has managed to swing an invitation by the Obama administration for a visit to the US before the end of the month.

Of course the officialdom is already painting the red, blue and white colors of her visit under the shibolleth of "stronger alliance and cooperation" but i think it is also about time we welcome her in Washington DC to answer frank questions about her own administration's dark records in corruption or for that matter in human rights. I will however defer the matter of human rights especially the extrajudicial killings in the Philippines to my Senator from Virginia - Jim Webb.

As we speak, the United States Department of Justice has since November 14, 2007 been in receipt of information submitted to it by a private think tank based in California concerning corruption and related crimes involving mail and wire fraud, money laundering and violation of RICO and U.S. Foreign Corrupt Practices Acts (FCPA), including New York's anti-enterprise corruption law, that directly affect the President and the First Gentleman.

Barry Sabin, then deputy assistant attorney-general, expressed his appreciation for the group's interest in protecting U.S. and international financial systems against financial crimes. "The Deparments of Justice, the Treasury and State," Sabin wrote "actively assist countries seeking to recover official assets misappropriated by kleptocrats."

"The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) is the investigative arm of the Department of Justice and we rely on the FBI to do the initial fact finding for federal criminal issues...The FBI will review the materials (submitted) and determine whether a federal investigation may be warranted."

The rap sheet indicted "President Arroyo and her husband, Jose Miguel “Mike” Arroyo a.k.a. Jose Pidal, and co-conspirators, among others, his former secretary, Victoria Toh, reportedly a resident of Canada; GSIS president Winston Garcia; Pagcor chair Efraim Genuino; former agriculture undersecretary Jocelyn Bolante and DBP president Reynaldo David for diverting and illegally investing public funds in Wall Street whose profits were allegedly skimmed off during bull market."

The think tank said that "when the funds were dissipated by losses caused by the U.S. financial markets meltdown, they washed their hands off while their own illicit gains were not touched and invested in real estate and other holdings including foreign deposit accounts in U.S. and international banks."

According to the information, "The Arroyos’ private co-conspirators include San Miguel Corporation (SMC) CEO Eduardo Cojuangco Jr. ex-Marcos trade and industry minister Roberto Ongpin, ex-trade and industry undersecretary Tomas Alcantara, ex-Arroyo’s publicist Dante Ang, Henry Sy, Lucio Tan (see below); ICTSI president Enrique Razon Jr. and many others to be named later as evidence against them is gathered."

"They received enormous favors from the Arroyos’ of sweetheart contracts for public works and enterprises or to take over government owned and controlled corporations (GOCCs). These private businessmen obviously paid off the Arroyos for the favors and they are likely to testify against the Arroyos to save their skins if and when they are indicted especially in the U.S. for their crimes," the group added.

America has an obligation to ferret out the involvement of these persons in the light of what an international treaty dictates as obligations of countries in curbing their culpability in financial crimes. The United Nations Convention Against Corruption is explicit in its intents, while the Philippines and the United States are committed signatories.

The treaty says “Countries agreed to cooperate with one another in every aspect of the fight against corruption, including prevention, investigation, and the prosecution of offenders. Countries are bound by the Convention to render specific forms of mutual legal assistance in gathering and transferring evidence for use in court, to extradite offenders. Countries are also required to undertake measures which will support the tracing, freezing, seizure and confiscation of the proceeds of corruption.”

To enforce the UNCAC President George W. Bush promulgated in August 2006 the “U.S. Strategy to Internationalize Efforts Against Kleptocracy” mandating the U.S. Government and its laws enforce the convention under this salient provision which reads, as follows: “A critical element in our fight against grand corruption is our effort to deny kleptocrats access to fruits of their corruption. The United States has a wide range of mechanisms to prevent, detect, and prosecute grand corruption, and trace and recover the proceeds of such corruption. We employ the full range of our authorities and tools in a comprehensive, strategic way to target assets misappropriated by current and former senior foreign government or political officials, their close associates and immediate family members, or other politically exposed persons (PEPs).”

What remains to be an perplexing question is why President Barack Obama seems to be playing footsies with the most notorious kleptocrat in the world today. Many are therefore asking - has Obama reversed the Bush doctrine on kleptocracy? This is what its invitation to Gloria appears to indicate. And malicious thinkers opine that the Arroyo billions have contaminated the White House, after all Barack himself is also running for reelection in 2012 and can use the money.

This is particularly suspicious, as President Arroyo herself has been making unexplained detours in recent trips, notably when she made an unscheduled trip to Cartagena, Colombia between her visits to Japan and Brazil. No less than Makati mayor Jejomar Binay said that the Filipino people deserved an explanation for this breach of protocol because she is travelling on Philippine taxpayers' expense.

Almost perfect cover was the alleged hosting by businessman Jaime Augusto Zobel and wife Lizzie, a Colombian. But Cartagena is not even the capital of Colombia. Cartagena is Colombia’s second largest port, second only to Buenaventura where a known Arroyo crony, businessman Ricky Razon of International Container Terminal Services Inc. (ICTSI) has invested $180 Million.

Speculation is rife that the Cartagena trip was really to make a quick connection to Panama. If you goggle "Panama offshore banking", this is one of the items you would most likely capture:

"Expedited Panama Bank Account Service. You can have a Panama Bank Account in 1-3 days. When you order our expedited service you can have your bank account open in just 3 days. It is also now possible to get a bank account and corporation in 24 hours using our rush service. This option does not require you to come to Panama. Select clients can now be interviewed without travelling to Panama." This of course could be made possible with the ICTSI connection.

Border crossings seems to be a pattern for the Arroyos.

Mike Arroyo stayed behind after his wife’s European visit in July 2006. Gloria Arroyo announced that her husband was staying behind in Spain to trace his ancestral links to St. Theresa de Avila. A source said that with a female travelling companion, Mike Arroyo went to Lugano which is "third behind only Zurich and Geneva as a Swiss banking center".

These are interesting leads for the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

But it will hold water only if President Obama has not turned his back on the American people and is not yet in the kleptocrat's tank.

Ado Paglinawan is a former press officer of the Philippine Embassy in Washington DC who occasionally contributes to the Philippines Daily Inquirer. He writes for various email groups and blogs under the pseudonym "mymaestro888". Ado has best served overseas Filipinos as a resource person providing inside information and backgrounders about the celebrated fertilizer scam that rocked the Philippine Agriculture Department and the Presidency since 2004.

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A Dinged Dong, Leaking Boobies, Sex, Lies, & Videotape Scandal in the Philippines complete with Sagging Butt

As one drives down the chaotic Edsa Highway that resembles a maze (one of the main thoroughfares in Metro Manila, Philippines) one cannot help but notice the huge posters of competing beauty clinics of Rosario Calayan of Calayan Surgicenter Corp. and Vicki Belo of Belo Medical Group (BMG) flaunting their piece of work in sexually suggestive poses. Handsome men, Beautiful women and even those in between as in gay or should we say reconditioned or perhaps reconfigured ooops no that is not the right word, let us just say beautifully enhanced perfectly molded models so shiny and bright in their almost Caucasian silken complexion so endowed in all the right places.

Gazing at these giant billboards almost gives you the feeling that you are not in the Philippines but in a tropical paradise island somewhere in dreamland where all the inhabitants are perfectly endowed with shapely figure so stunningly beautiful. Then there is this giant poster of a sexy actress/model with a foreign sounding name, the type I see in the bike paths of California’s picturesque landscape rollerblading or simply playing in the sands in their thongs trying to get as much sun to get that lovely tan. Except this actress/model was not exactly fair complexioned in the first place but with the wonders of the beauty clinic made her look like a sexy beach siren for a whopping cost of P500K to whiten her dark complexion according to our friend making a joke about the poster girl. The only problem was that her true colors errrr dark skin was evident as her offspring came out in this world with a dark complexion because the actress/model has dark complexion in the first place. So much for that farcical irony this article is all about what is going on with the beauty/cosmetic surgery clinic in the Philippines? Or better yet what is wrong with cosmetic surgery in the land where corruption is so endemic?

First we heard of the woes of a dinged dong of Filipino-American Louem Martinez who came to the Calayan Surgicenter Corp. for the removal of a cyst. Say what? Cyst removal so how in the name of Garcified backdoor Comelec electoral cheating did his dong got dinged? Heck, this is like a young clueless naive car buyer going to a used car lot sweet talked by hustler salesman into buying a lemon because he was offered whistles and bang like the stereotypical used car transaction to have his cyst removed, together with liposuction thrown in and an offer he can’t refuse...... a penile enlargement. Of course with a deal like that you ought to have a bad feeling that something amiss is going to happen and it did. True enough not only was his cyst not totally removed his prized possession also went bonkers and as if by a stroke of a Madam Auring psychic prediction I asked a while back which
I quote:
A patient seeking redress for his deformed pride and glory being counter sued is not pleasant and truly makes it a horrible experience. Top that with a banned device if it is true as claimed by Martinez lawyer and BFAD Director Gutierrez implanted inside your body is not exactly safe and reassuring. Calayan claims that it was Aquamid that she used and just made a mistake in saying Aquagel but the point is these substances are irrelevant if both were not approved by BFAD. Think of what will happen if a woman goes for breast augmentation, or reshaping some snub nosed Filipinos that may end up shaped into a bursting tomato using banned medical devices is just scary..... yikes and you get bullied with a counter lawsuit is like adding insult to injury and what about organ transplant? Oh never mind, lets deal with that some other time....... continue reading.
So now after the sex, lies, and videotape scandal of a Hayden Camera errr Kho the young doctored errr physician lover of antique oooops mother figure lover boy to the reconditioned yikes I meant beauty doctor Vicki Belo’s scandal reports are coming in if accurate on the leaking boobies of Gloria Arroyo no less points to Belo’s direction. This reminds me of a very funny satire written by Manuel Buencamino who wrote that as soon as Gloria woke up after the surgery at the Asian Hospital half dazed was muttering the famous first words :
Yon dagdag? Yon dagdag?
To which I responded with:
Did the doctor not respond with…… Don’t worry Madam President we had Garci assist us in making sure we counted the augmentation the Comelec way………
Anyway, this is really getting worse and it does not help Medical Tourism that the Philippine government is promoting when another botched operation scandal once again mars the fake errr beauty industry. There it is again as Trixie Cruz-Angeles posted a video below she aptly describes as Butt, lies and videotape...

Businesswoman Josefina Norcio who went to Belo Medical Group clinic for butt augmentation, things would have been fine except one butt cheek came out bigger than the other. She went back to have it corrected and another doctor attended to her but now instead of just a sagging butt she found herself in the intensive care of St. Luke’s Medical Center (SLMC) for serious bacteria infection spreading to other parts of her body reported to have been caused by the hydrogel implant. An ordeal where the patient almost died is not exactly one would imagine finding themselves in such a situation over beauty enhancement is just scary.

This one is something to watch one that has similarity to the Louem Martinez dinged dong ordeal wherein the principal conveniently absolves themselves from responsibility because they were not the one who personally operated, inserted or did the procedure. According to Trixie Cruz-Angeles responding to my query the complainant will be running after all those who are responsible:

Though in general we are after the BMG as a corporate person on two grounds:
  1. Fraud in misrepresenting the safety of the procedure and of the polyacrilamide hyrdorgel; and
  2. Reckless imprudence both in the use of the untested hydrogel and the use of untrained physicians who are neither surgeons nor plastic surgeons.
Let us see how this will turn out, another one of those scandals people who are contemplating on having a procedure done in Manila to do their own due diligence before jumping into the beauty enhancement that may turn out to be life threatening.

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Filipinos who became US Citizens...

I found this funny FaceBook note of Francis San Gabriel on Filipinos who became US citizens. I bet you this will give you a good laugh but you have to speak or understand the Filipino language to appreciate this.
The US INS recently released the list of names of Filipinos who changed their names when they became naturalized U.S. Citizens. Who knows...you might encounter them one day.
  • Gregorio Talahib - George Bush
  • Tomas Cruz - Tom Cruise
  • Macario Maldonado - Mac Donald
  • Remegio Batungbacal- Remington Steel
  • Victoria Malihim-Victoria Secret
  • Bienvenido Jurado - Ben Hur
  • Juanito Lakarin - Johnny Walker
  • Federico Hagibis- Federal Express
  • Esteban Magtaka - Stevie Wonder
  • Jaime Bondoc - James Bond
  • Leon Mangubat - Tiger Woods
  • Eleuterio Ignacio- Electronic Ignition
  • Burgos Bahag-Hari - Burger King
  • Kasimiro Bukaykay - Cashmere Bouquet
  • Maria Calas - Mary Kay
  • Rogelio Dagdagan - Roger Moore
  • Topacio Mamaril - Top Gun
  • Restituto Pruto - Tutti Frutti
  • Samue l Tampipi - Sam Sonite
  • Veneracion De Asis - Venereal Disease
  • Alfonso De Asis - Alzheimer Disease
  • Francisco Portero - Frank Porter
  • Diosdado Durante- Deo Dorant
  • Roberto Controlado- Bert Control
  • Carpio Llanes - Carpool Lanes
  • Julia Domingo - Holy Sunday
  • Maria Pascua - Mary Christmas
  • Ligaya Anonuevo - Happy New Year
  • Elena Mangaso – Helen Hunt
  • Nicasio Jaula – Nicolas Cage [actor Nicolas Cage’s real name: Nicolas Coppola]
  • Demetria Dagdag – Demi Moore [Note: the real name of the Demi Moore is Demetria Guynes]
  • Mandolina Dagdag – Mandy Moore
  • Miguelito Zapatero – Michael Schumacher [teka, Aleman yata itong kumag na ito ah ( Wait this one seems German)]
  • Hugo Bigyan – Hugh Grant [Ingles naman tong isang ito. At ang tunay na Hugo Bigyan ay isang artist na nakatira sa paanan ng Bundok Banahaw (This one is a Brit but the real Hugo Bigyan is an artist living at the foot of Mt. Banahaw)]
  • Cariazo Bigyan – Cary Grant [medyo may edad na itong isang ito, pati na yung sumulat ( It seems this one is old and so is the writer)]
  • Casimiro N. Cariazo – Cash N. Carry
  • Guillermo Tarangkahan – Bill Gates
  • Derelicto Ramos – Derek Ramsey [teka, Amboy to ah! ( Wait this one is an American Boy)]
  • Vedasto “Bhoy” Ramos – Ving Rhames
  • Caridad Ginagabi-gabi – Kiera Knightley
  • Mateo Damujo – Matt Damon

  • **Meron pang dagdag: (There's more from the creative thinker "jgg")
  • Karen Batobato - Sharon Stone
  • Roberto Maasahin - Bob Hope
  • Hilaria Kulintang - Hillary Clinton
  • William Pisara - Bill Board
  • Amelia Pagbigyan - Amy Grant
  • Labrador N. Kiskis - Love N. Kisses
  • Barako Bombador - Barack Obama
And who can beat this couple . .. . .
  • Irineo BustaMante - IBM
  • Linda BustaMante - LBM

Disclaimer: This article is listed under satire and therefore is just that, satire. While some of the names listed are actual names or real persons they are entirely fictitious not targeting any particular individual. It is a fiction and humor that is not intended to maliciously hurt or offend people in any manner or form.

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